January is National Mentorship Month; providing guidance is a major part of being your brother's keeper, as well as learning how to accept help from those with more experience. We ask President of Wilson College and Foundation Trustee, Wes Fugate, Centre '99, to reflect on his experience being a mentee and mentor to others.
Q: Think about a mentors you've had. How did they help guide you in your personal and/or professional life?
A: I have had many mentors in my career, as well as personally. Each take a different approach, but one commonality is that a great mentor understands you on a personal and professional level. They understand that our lives are not compartmentalized, and that our personal life impacts our professional life and vice versa. A good mentor gets to know your goals, your barriers to success, and how you think. Then, they help you to see doors of opportunity and avoid missteps. They tell you the news you do not want to hear, turning it into teachable moments. They celebrate your success, but also challenge you to go even further. Most importantly, they make themselves available.
Q: How have mentors assisted you in times of need?
A: I have found that mentors are at their best in your times of need. They allow you to share and truly listen. They provide advice, but they also understand that you have to make decisions on your own. Most importantly, they help you find a path to success. For example, as someone from the LGBTQ+ community, it can be challenging finding an institution that wants to have an open chief executive. Add to it that I was young and not from the academic side of higher education (a foundation from which most presidents come), and the challenge became even greater. Time and time again, doors would shut. I was frustrated and thought that maybe I wouldn’t make it to my goal. But without fail, mentors would tell me that my time was coming, I just needed to find the right fit. And they were right! I had never even made it to a finalist interview before landing one at Wilson College, and was then offered the position almost immediately following the completion of their last interview.
Q: How have mentors celebrated your successes?
A: Professionally, I have been fortunate to find mentors, particularly supervisors, who not only want me to succeed but understand that my success— even if it means leaving my role— is a success for them and their company. When I think back on my time at Randolph College, the president there took immense pride in my achieving of goals, sometimes to his own detriment. While serving as his Chief of Staff, he posed that I take on another role to stand out more in presidential searches, believing I’d learn all that I could from the position. He offered to move me to a different vice presidential role. At first, I was offended that he would not want me by his side, advising him on a day-to-day basis. In fact, he informed me how difficult it would be to not depend on me in that role, but he also knew that this would help my career—he was right.
Q: What lessons did you learn as a mentee that have helped you in your current role as President of Wilson College?
A: Honestly, some of the most important lessons have been life skills, that maybe the mentor did not even realize they were teaching me. Simple things like the power of a handwritten note; the benefit of getting to know every member of the team, no matter their role, income or background, on a personal basis; and the importance of acknowledging mistakes. I use each one of those tips daily as President of Wilson. At the same time, I learned that learning never stops. During the tough times, I should not only call on others to help me think through challenges, but to find solutions to those challenges. There are also bigger lessons I’ve taken away. Two examples: first, you never know what is going on in someone’s life or the challenges they may face. Remember that we all deserve the chance to succeed despite our seen or unseen barriers. Secondly, you are not effective in leading a team if you are not refreshed. Find ways to “refill your emotional bucket,” which for me is not something I do particularly well, but am learning how to do so.
Q: What lessons did you learn as a mentee that you now share as a mentor to others?
A: First and foremost, communicate, communicate, communicate. If I have learned anything from my professional career, it is that good communication is the lifeblood of any organization. Secondly, I often mentor high achieving people. It is important for them to understand that they do not have all the answers, and no one expects them to. That is why we have teams. Thirdly, I always remind mentees to pay it forward. I have been given much in my life, including great mentorship, and I feel obligated to pass that along to others who might benefit equally. I have seen that play out in Phi Tau in remarkable ways. Many men I advised while they were undergraduates now serve on BOGs themselves. It is wonderfully gratifying to see them paying it forward.
Q: Any final advice you can give as a mentor to our brotherhood?
A: Relationships matter. Get to know people and support each other. One of the highlights of my Phi Tau experience was serving as Dean of Leadership Academy for a number of years. During that time, I got to know so many young members of our fraternity seeking to do good in the world. I still mentor many of these men, but I hope all of them know that I am always a call, text, email, or social media interaction away, even if we have not been in touch for a while. Finally, I learn as much from mentoring as I do by being mentored. The learning never stops.
This article is a part of the #mybrotherskeeper series, focused on topics of mental health, guidance, and support towards brothers. If you would like to submit a perspective for #mybrotherskeeper please contact communications@phikappatau.org.
